end '09

I am still not ready to leave this year, 2009. & if possible, i don't want this year to end, i don't want this year to go, i want to re-start this year, may i? *sigh* I have been through a lot of things in this year, taught me a lot of new things, about how to choose a good better friends ever, how to differentiate between good & bad, how to be more independent, more mature without thinking about others might said. but in this situation, i am still don't know what am i did wrong because people never stop talking bad about me, about who am i being friends with. but i don't care about what they will say or might just accusing me without knowing anything, well that's we call 'mulut orang' -.-

People loveeeeee to judge other people, meanwhile they don't even know what they did, what they said that might just letting other people or even us put a judge back on them. well, let's just put this aside. this topic is just boring & lame somehow HA-HA.

Okay so, in this year, i admit that i am a bit wilder than before, but i am still know how to control myself & not getting involve in such things that i did before or maybe just more bad. *i hope not! well i think you don't have to know HAHA :P hm i don't know how am i getting to stand on my own feet, leading my own life without someone that i can rely on, best friends beside me, standing tall together, been through good & bad moments together, i mean, they are just so nice to me. i don't know how to repay back all their kindness towards me. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FRIENDS :) i don't even want to lose them. friends are hard to find, maybe it is easy for you to say, but for me, true friends are really hard to find, really hard to replace. even ONE -.-'
but i need to realize that takkan forever aku nak bergantung hidup dengan orang kan? but let's just give me some time, some space to move on & facing all things in my life that will coming to show up.

maybe some other day, perhaps. but i think not now, for sure ;) i really need someone to rely on right now. i am not ready at all :) sorry

thank you for reading this boring blog -____-' byeee